I Didn’t Settle. I Have Exactly What I Want (Except A Fully Functioning Right Arm…)

I’m still here folks.  I’ve just been getting this arm healed and been busy with life.

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The other day I was reading one of blogs I follow (Can’t remember which one to give credit…) and I stumbled across blackdragonblog.  I haven’t read too much of it yet, but what I have seems very good.  He has a premise of there being two main categories of Alpha men.  He designates them as Alpha 1.0, the old version, and Alpha 2.0, the new and improved version.

Very simplified, Alpha 1.0 is a man in a married, monogamous relationship.  He works for, or owns a business.  He manages many employees and has lots of drama in his life.

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Alpha 2.0 is a man who is not married, non monogamous, has a location independent business and works for himself.  He leads a drama free life because he is not tied to one woman and has no employees to manage.

There are many other factors to these two versions, please read his blog for a full description.

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While I do see his point in the freedom that Alpha 2.0 provides, I wonder if he doesn’t fully understand how good and drama free a marriage can be?  I can understand people not realizing that is possible, especially if they have never experienced it.

As I have outlined before, it wasn’t always this good.  We never fought much, in fact very rarely… like every five years or so… really.  It was the sex that was lacking.  However, now with sex virtually daily, I’m not sure a single guy could do much better than that.  One might ask, “Ahh yes, but what about variety?  Crossing things off the sexual bucket list?”  Well, that’s coming along nicely as well.  I imagine there are a few that will have to remain in realm of fantasy, but dang near all my list has been crossed off.  We have a few to go, but I see them on the horizon.

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As far as work, I get the work from home no boss thing.  I believed that would be awesome too.  I thought real estate would be my path to that care free life.  I found out people are assholes and I really don’t like dealing with them.  More importantly, despite my broker trying to convince me I was, “helping people achieve their dreams of home ownership”,  it didn’t resonate for me.  At all.  After you help someone escape a human trafficker and drug addiction, and see them succeed long term, nothing can compare.  I found hunting a criminal that can (and will) kill you is a rush you can get from no other activity.  I’ve been shot at where bullets hit a tree a foot from my head, I’ve fought for my life on the side of a road in the middle of the night (and several other occasions), I’ve had to notify parents their twin teenagers were killed on a motorcycle.  Some good experiences, some bad, but I would not trade any of it.  If your life consists of manning a cubicle from 9 to 5 I suppose you would be enamored with a life of perceived freedom.  For me, freedom is facing your fears, looking the devil in the eye and telling that bastard, “Not Today…  One day maybe, but it won’t be today…”

Sure, I’ll never have millions of dollars, or live abroad, but I am more than comfortable financially.  Honestly, I’ve travelled some and if you can’t find a place that is awesome right here in the U.S. you haven’t looked hard enough.  I’m just fine.  Besides, our plan is to live near the grandkids wherever that may be.  That is truly a goal for me.

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I don’t think Alpha 2.0 is a bad thing.  Hell, it sounds awesome, but I don’t think choosing marriage and career is settling.  Not if you choose wisely.  That’s the key.  Choosing wisely.  If you pick the wrong woman or career you can doom yourself to a life time of what if’s.  I don’t wonder what if.

Sure, I see a woman and wonder what she looks like when she comes.  That’s human nature and any man, married or single, who says he doesn’t is likely lying to you, and more likely his wife out of the fear of her insecurity.  I am married to a secure woman who is happy to point out other women, making sure I never miss a nice ass or great set of tits.  Late last summer we were leaving the beach in our jeep and had stopped for cokes for the ride home.  I saw an attractive older woman pull up and buy a single banana.  I thought it was strange to stop at a minute market for that, but whatever, she had a nice body.  I forgot about her.  As we loaded up in the jeep to leave, my wife hits me and points out the woman sitting next to us in her black Mercedes.  She was literally deep throating the banana.  I kid you not, all alone in the car.  I thought she was screwing with us, but we drove off and she still sitting there working that banana as we left.

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Yes, I could date, and find a woman who may make sure I don’t miss anything.  The question is why would I?  My wife initiates sex about 40% of the time these days.  I may plan on it, but she beats me to it.  Mind you, next week will be our 25th anniversary and we have been having sex over thirty two years.

I will follow Blackdagon because I think his posts are awesome and relevant.  You should check him out as well.  I just believe I am happy with my Alpha 1.0 life.  I will pick up things from him along the way and apply them to my circumstances where they fit.

That’s the way it should be.  No two men live in exactly the same circumstances.  Pick up things from each other along the way.  Discard what doesn’t apply to you.  Make your life the best it can be.

Be true to yourself.  Whether your dream is live abroad and bang as many women as you can, or grow old living near your family, banging the same woman who does that you thing you like even after two or three decades of doing it, go for it.  One thing is for sure, if you aren’t true to yourself, it will show and you won’t be banging anything except your fist…

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