Today I was reading a post on the blog Notes From a Red Pill Girl and I came across this post. In the post RPG talks about the downside of red pill awareness, primarily regret for the lost time trying to live the lies we’ve been told since we were kids about men, women and marriage. I like RPG, she gets it from a female perspective and is trying to educate other women on the perils of feminism, riding the cock carousel, and rejecting traditional marriage and values.
After reading her post, I thought about what my wife and I missed during those years of ignoring and suppressing my natural state to conform to what I thought (and was told by feminism) my wife wanted. I became angry and had written a long post outlining all the mistakes I made, mourning over all the time I wasted for us. Then something happened to change my entire perspective.
After several successive days of sex (which is normal nowadays) and a great session the previous night, my wife packed up for bed early out of the blue. I said “Going to bed?” a little disappointed as we had just started watching a show on demand. She said “Yeah, you coming dude?” and grabbed my head as she passed behind my recliner. As much as I wish it were so, my wife is not one to lean over and whisper in my ear, “I need you to come fuck me.” However, in the years since finding and implementing a red pill marriage (when I am not initiating sex) my wife has developed a subtle, yet definite, way of telling me she wants sex. A good time followed for both of us.
Afterwards, as she slept soundly as she often does after sex, I thought about the post and our past. I thought about how far we’d come, how much has changed. I thought to myself that while remembering the past is important to avoid future mistakes, dwelling on past failures is counterproductive.
This morning I woke up early and deleted the extensive post I made ranting about how bad things were sexually because of my lack of leadership. That shit is in the past. It’s done and over. It’s time to move on and instead look forward to what’s around the corner.
While those early, sexually frustrating days will always be in the back of my mind as a place I never want to return to in our marriage, I know now there is a better life out there. I know that our future is where our focus should be.